Old but Young

 
She is with me 01/07/2009
 

My Granny is a sweetheart

She gave me joy, hope and delight

She was my sunshine

In all meanings                

I loved her and still do

I will never forget her

Although she is so far away now

She will forever be in my heart

And never will anything do us apart

Because she is always with me

In dreams and in day light

I see her all the time

I see her everywhere

She is with me now

And will always be with me

I don’t have to see her in reality

Cause her soul is with me

Surrounding me and fulfilling me

With all her love and her beautiful smile

That gives me strength and faith

Words will never be enough

To describe my love

And my great loss.

 
Her Death 01/05/2009
 

Never ever thought that this day will come

Or to be more precise, never wanted it to come

Although I knew she was getting older

And I’ve seen the changes in her walk, talk, and her shrinking face

But to hear about her death, is unconvincing

Not because I don’t understand, nor that I have no faith

But because she is my Everything.

I could have believed it if anybody else died; even it would have been her husband

Who is my Grandfather, and it was even expected.

But her, My Granny, the love of my life, NO.

I do understand that it happened and that her life has ended

But I can’t imagine that I won’t see her again

Not to mention that I won’t talk to her as well

This is the hardest of all.

Now that I am far away from home, I am still wondering

How will it be when I go back home in summer

Going there and not finding her around

Not running towards her warm hug and kissing her

I will Then face the greatest shock, not NOW.

Maybe I will ask my grandfather where is she?

Or maybe I will go straight to the kitchen to search for her

I don’t know what I will do then

Or what will I do later

It is all Over.

 
 

I heard the bad news

I heard that my granny is unwell

And that her case was critical

All I wanted was to go and see her

I had to see her

Although I am so far away

I am not in the same country anymore

I am not so close to her like before

But I decided that I have to see her

Even though I’ll leave my kids

All alone, first time to do this

But it was something that I had to do.

I arrived there the following day

I went running to see her before it’s too late

I was so worried that I wouldn’t make it on time.

And then what did I see? Who did I see?

Where is my granny?

Who is this body lying on bed in this hospital?

Yes she has the same resemblance

Although with great difference

But where is the life of my granny

Where is her soul and being?

She was supposed to be living.

I didn’t see my sweet granny

I didn’t see the one I know

And now that it’s time for me to go

I feel so bad, unsafe, terrified and so low.

Where is my granny? I want to see her, hold her, kiss her, hug her

And I want her to feel me too, and then I can go.

Will I be able to see her again?

I really really don’t know.

 
My Granny 01/03/2009
 

This blog is dedicated for my Granny whom I love  extraordinarily. I lived with her all my life before getting married, she was my true mom who made all my dreams come true. You will find my full story on my "All True" blog soon.